Groovilicious. We're not doctors, but we can definitely fix whatever it is that's wrong with you. We fully understand the benefits of a healthy, balanced, wholesome groove, an uncompromised groove, a GROOVY groove, in a way that can be harvested and mass reproduced at min-cost labor warehouses in a place not unlike southeastern China for your benefit. Do you wake up feeling groggy? Are there blood clots in your leg? We have just the groove for you. Has your significant other departed in the middle of the night with your car, kids, dog, and favorite tie that was in the backseat of the car, leaving behind only a note that says "There is one last potato salad in the fridge. I know how much you love potato salad. Which is a lot more than you love me. Goodbye, Max."? Are mysterious hives breaking out across your body? Headaches? We've got backbeats that'll straighten even the most scoliosissed spine. One of our grooves even stopped a speeding train from making oatmeal out of a midwestern family. Does your life feel empty? Unsatisfied? Like there must be something more? Well there is! And it's funky.